Never in a million years did I ever think about becoming a fashion blogger or as everyone calls it today, an influencer. Growing up I don’t think there’s one moment where I can remember not feeling self-conscious about something, whether it be my non-trendy clothes, my body, my hair, my face. From cruel kids teasing me about my clothes or family members teasing me about my body (or big booty) as I went through awkward phases, to being shamed by my middle school teachers for wearing shorts that were too short or a shirt that showed a bit of my tummy when I raised my hands (that’s a whole other issue for another time). I don’t really have a moment growing up where I felt comfortable in my own skin.
So when I decided to start my blog and have my boyfriend (now husband) at the time take my pics, I felt sooooo uncomfortable. Especially as I looked at big bloggers with these perfect editorial-like quality photos who were also so skinny to where any piece of clothing looked good on them. It was hard not to compare myself to that.
Slowly over the years of doing this I began to get more and more comfortable being in front of the camera, especially as I started learning my own angles that worked best for me. It also is helpful that I shoot everything with my husband (who before he met me had never touched a DSLR camera) we have our rhythm of shooting outfits and though he still captures some of the most unflattering images of me, he also is really good at capturing me at my best as well.
A lot of what helped me find my confidence in front of the camera has to do with self love and prioritizing myself and my health. Things like eating healthier, getting into a gym routine and choosing sleep over staying up late have helped so much with how I see myself. Now, I’m not saying you need to lose weight to be happy but you need to set time aside for yourself for both your mental and physical well-being to do what it is that makes you feel happy. For me, a regular gym routine (not for the perfect bod) but to be healthy and clear my mind is becoming increasingly important.
At the end of the day the biggest thing hold you back is worrying about what others think. It can be hard to be our authentic selves but at the end of the day who you are is all you’ve got so why would you not show it to the world?
Outfit Details
Dress (Lucky Brand) // Earrings (Baleen)
